Today I learned that one of my most particular regulars is moving out of state within the month. Even though she is incredibly particular about every aspect of her beverage I was saddened to hear she was leaving. At first I wasn't entirely sure why. I was reminded that everyone we run into during our lifetime has at least one lesson to teach us. As soon as they teach us what they have to they disappear, moving on and perpetuating the process of education.
What was it this woman taught me?
The first time I met Sylvie was my third day on the floor and it was a nightmare. It was around seven o'clock on a chilly April morning. I hopped off the bus and walked a couple blocks to the shoppe in the morning twilight. It was nice outside, one of those spring days where you can smell the rain coming. Perfect coffee shoppe weather. I love working while it is raining outside. Everything seems warm and inviting when you know the is grey. Being over half and hour early I grabbed a cup o'joe, took a seat at the bar and chit chat with the woman barista on the floor until it was time to clock in. 0700: I was feeling pretty confident that it was going to be an enjoyable day. Finals were over, business slowed down and there I was. I saw a couple walking in. I recognized them from earlier in the week. It was Sylvie and her husband. She always seemed nice to my boss so I wasn't too worried. Then the interaction started. We got through the pleasantries:
"G'morning, how are you?"..."What can I get for you?"...
But then my computer started acting up. I got frustrated which led to me making mistakes. I got flustered and couldn't remember how to punch in her drink...It took me three attempts to get her drink into the computer. She was a little irritated I could tell. Then I forgot to mark no foam and no whip on the cup, this destroyed her drink. It ruined my day. After that I couldn't get anything right. She was not happy. She let me know by double checking that I got her drink correct...day after day and week after week she would come into the shoppe and I would get nervous and make mistakes. She would get short with me. It went on like this for four months. Eventually it stopped. I was never sure what it was but one morning we both just did our thing. I took her order with no mistakes. It went off with out a hitch. She taught me a lesson that few ever have the opportunity to learn: to be patient with myself and listen. after a while I was able to calm down, memorized her drink and that was that.
Remaining calm enough to really listen to people in this hectic world is a lost art. That day, when I violated Sylvie's expectations by ruining her drink I was not calm. I was frustrated that I wasn't getting the hang of this coffee order lingo (Ristretto? Shots in the dark?...That is poetic but what the hell is it? Pull the coffee? Slide?...I don't remember anything...). Instead of simply taking my time, asking questions and allowing myself to absorb I allowed myself to be overwhelmed. "Keep Calm and Carry On". Those words actually use to mean something. We were once patient people. We use to acknowledge each other's presence, not just walk up to a coffee counter and blurt out our order. We use to respect one another. We use to listen. Unfortunately we, as a society, have shifted away from this fashion of living.
The lesson I learned from Sylvie over the last year is that no matter how hectic the world around us becomes we are capable of maintaining the stillness inside of us and listening to our fellow humans. It is amazing the difference this makes in every aspect of your life.
